Work & Identity

Do you have to love your work to enjoy it or nah?

There are two types of people:

those who need their work to be purposeful, meaningful, and perhaps even enmeshed with their identities outside of work

And those who see work as a separate entity to who they are, and don’t need it to fulfill a deeper purpose other than being a source of making a living

Where do you sit within those two frames?

---

An American study conducted by BetterUp found out that 9 in 10 employees would be prepared to earn less in exchange for more meaningful work. Would you, or would you not?

Is work a part of your identity, completely separate from it, or somewhere in between? I imagine someone reading this already has their guard up, wanting to defend and prove that work isn’t their identity. Despite how long it took them to assess the job they have— what it’ll say about them, the pay, what society already thinks about them, the status of the company, the title, what the culture is like, the team, and if the day to day role will make them happy.

If that’s you, I’ll encourage you to drop your shoulders. Unclench your jaw. Breathe out. There is nothing wrong with wanting something deeper than a paycheque each month from your work. There’s also nothing wrong with the opposite — only wanting a (good) paycheque from your job, everything else is a bonus.

After the pandemic upended everything we thought we knew about work, a lot of us have reconsidered not just the work we do but also why we do it. We’ve reassessed our beliefs about our work and what it means as part of our life. For me, that meant deciding I no longer wanted to be part of the accounting industry and instead pivoting to a career where my super strengths could shine through. It meant sitting down, reading books, and doing lots of exercises to determine what I was great at, where I could contribute the most, and what I wanted to spend my days doing.

What is the story I want to tell my husband about my day at the end of it? What lit up my world? What made me too giddy to sleep and got me springing out of bed? What problems was I solving that really made a difference?

It wasn’t easy figuring it all out but one thing I realized is — work is a big part of my identity. It defines a part of who I am and what I’m interested in. For a lot of people reading this, I reckon that is also the case. We want to take pride and find fulfillment in what we do, and also where we do it. A title wasn’t what I was after, but creative autonomy, impact, and value-add. The pay rise was a really nice (albeit also needed) bonus.

In a generation where work and life seem so easily entangled especially for creators, it’s not always easy to separate the two — where work ends and ‘life’ begins. If you’re a content creator, every interaction, moment, or event is something to be captured and likely monetised. If you’re an influencer, you’re hyper-aware of what you’re buying because people take it as gospel and a recommendation for them to also buy. If you’re an artist, you’re taking inspiration from everything. And the wheels keep spinning on and on.

At some point during the pandemic, I decided I no longer believed in “work-life balance.” Work was a part of, not outside of, my life. And balance for me was understanding which season of life I was in and therefore what I was leaning more into. There were weeks and months I was super focused on me. What Bukiie wants is what Bukiie gets. A spa day. A new coat. Sushi for dinner. New nails done. A longer bath time. Whatever made me feel good, I pressed into that. On the flip side there were also weeks and months I was head down and neck-deep in the thick of work. I might have longer days and shorter nights because that was what work required of me, and I did it. Because I am constantly pouring into myself (or at least most times), I had enough in me to also pour out to work.

As the saying goes — I can’t be anything to anyone if I am nothing to myself.

Work spills out from my life and the room I create in it for it — not the other way round. I plan my work around my life — not the other way round. And so if you ask me if work was a part of my identity? Absolutely. After pivoting my career, or as I say, stepping into phase 2 of my career, I am now in the position to really do the work I want to be doing. My days make me happy, and truly light me up in the best ways. I found my zone of genius and honed in on it. I learned what my super strengths are and found the peg that fits perfectly into it.

But don’t get it twisted — doing what you love will still be WORK. There are days that are tougher than others, and days I would rather stay in bed. I don’t believe that doing what you love means you won’t have to work or it won’t feel like work. I used to before because it sounded like a fun phrase. But certainly, now that I am older and wiser, my head and my body know I’ve been working after a 10-hour day. My depleted energy knows how hard I work, and those around me certainly attest to the work I do.

I love that I have my identity rooted in my faith, but expressed in more ways than one. From being a daughter, sister, and wife, to the 9-5 work that I do, to the 5-9 projects I’m involved in, to being a friend, to helping out whenever and wherever I can. It’s a privilege but one I’m always willing to share with others in hope that they too realise that they can constantly be evolving and reinventing themselves to be whoever they want to be.

It’s been a wild ride in the short but long first part of my career. But I am excited for this new chapter and grateful to be here. I know that the work that I do is part of my life’s work and will make me fulfilled. Anything worth having is worth fighting for. So I hope you fight for the work that you’ll be proud to have as part of your identity.

Do you see work as part of your identity or are you separate from it? Click the comment bubble to share your thoughts, I’d’ love to know what you think.